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Using Self Control For Controlling Anxiety Symptoms

Self control is an essential element of most, if not all, aspects of self improvement. There is a strong co-relationship between the level of success you can have in improving your life, and the level of self control you are able to apply to do so. Anxiety is something you can exert control over in a number of ways, by being more positive, and consciously trying to exert that control.

There are a few steps that you can take to develop some level of control over anxiety symptoms, and Deanne Repich's article below considers one key aspect: what is genuine control? After all, it is only genuine control that will help you; illusory self control will not.

What Is Genuine Control?

by Deanne Repich

-- Genuine control is not something lost or gained according to what someone else says, does or thinks. It is within me in abundance at all times.

-- Genuine control is not about trying to make people like or love me. It's about liking and loving myself and allowing my inner beauty to shine through.

-- Genuine control is not something that comes from manipulating the external environment - other people, events, and circumstances. It comes from changing my internal environment - how I perceive and act.

-- Genuine control does not result in feelings of powerlessness, anxiety, and self-doubt. It results in feelings of empowerment, contentment, and increased self-esteem.

-- Genuine control does not drag me down. It lifts me up.

-- Genuine control does not come and go depending on how I'm feeling at the moment. It is within me at all times, even if I choose not to realize it or use it.

-- Genuine control does not mean attempting to make others do things my way and think the way I want. It means making my own choices and thinking for myself.

-- Genuine control does not mean looking outside of myself to determine who I am. It means looking within myself and appreciating who I am.

-- Genuine control does not mean single-handedly transforming economies, business climates, and political realities. It means transforming my internal reality (myself), which in turn positively affects the whole.

-- Genuine control is not about predicting the future - my grades, my income, my relationships, or a thousand other things. It's knowing that whatever happens I can choose how to perceive and react to life's events.

-- Genuine control does not mean trying to change someone else's feelings. It means that each person's feelings are his or hers alone, just as my feelings are mine alone.

-- Genuine control does not mean never making mistakes. It means understanding that making mistakes (and learning from them!) is essential to my success.

-- Genuine control is not about feeling the need to change other peoples' preferences and opinions. It means developing and respecting my own.

-- Genuine control does not mean attempting the impossible and feeling disappointed that I did not achieve it. It means attempting the possible and congratulating myself on each small success I achieve.

-- Genuine control does not mean telling others how to spend their time. It means choosing how I spend my time. -- Genuine control does not mean other people, events, and situations determine my feelings, thoughts, and actions. It means that I choose how to feel, think, and act.

-- Genuine control is not about trying to stop the rain, the snow, or the sunshine. It's about making rainbows, snowmen, and sand castles. :)

-- Genuine control is not about attempting to change what other people think, do, and feel because I know what's best for them. It's about deciding how I react to what others think, do, and feel because I know what's best for me.

-- Genuine control does not mean controlling all of life's events. It means interpreting life's events in a way that promotes my growth, happiness, and well-being.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR: Deanne Repich is the Founder of the National Institute of Anxiety and Stress, Inc., an anxiety educator, teacher, and former anxiety sufferer. Deanne created the Conquer Your Anxiety Success Program, a simple, action-oriented "how-to" course that has helped thousands across the globe conquer their anxiety. She also conducts seminars, writes articles, and publishes the free "Anxiety Tips" newsletter.

© Copyright March 4, 2003 by Deanne Repich and the National Institute of Anxiety and Stress, Inc.

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